Between the Teeth of Lions: Part Two: The Seer

[jesterladyfic]

Part Two: The Seer

Kyra’s been alive far longer than she can properly remember. All the eons just sort of blend together. She doesn’t really have any emotions to help the time pass and her visions are practically meaningless, little bits of information to twist to her purposes. Her fellow demons are as much a blur as her past. It’s all the same, darkness, fire, kill the witches, try to take over the world.

Even really memorable patches like when Zankou was around aren’t enough to bolster her interest. He was truly evil and she’d reveled in that at the time, even regretting it when the Source banished him. But it had been quickly forgotten for whatever pursuit she had been interested in after that.

She’s left alone unless someone seeks her advice on the future. Her visions are always accurate and she is very good at interpreting them. She does like the air of mystery that surrounds her and how uncomfortable she makes people by proclaiming things about their future, enigmatically or not. She would never have survived as long as she has if she didn’t have a little bit of a jump. Her active powers consist entirely of shimmering and while that was a great aid in running away, it wasn’t an amazing long-term plan when it came to dealing with her enemies.

It has to be the isolation but she never really feels like she’s meant to be here, doing this. The demon bit is exciting sometimes and the visions are very useful, but there’s really no point to anything. There’s always an underlying voice in her thoughts urging her in different directions. Mostly she manages to curb it because she’s a demon and that’s what she’s supposed to do.

But she can’t the day the Elder shows up.

There’s something about him…something about his pain that intrigues her immensely. A father afraid for his son. A human being feeling emotions and acting out because of them. It fascinates her. And she helps him. No tricks, no dodges, just helps him. Being as snarky as she likes in the meantime because she is a demon, after all, but she doesn’t withhold anything from him. He doesn’t like what he finds but that’s not her problem and she smiles when he leaves.

Even if it had been an abnormal thing for her to do she’s sure she can use it to her advantage somehow. She has infinite patience when it comes to her visions.

It still grates a little bit that she’d been urged to do something almost…good. She’s not good, she’s a demon. She may not be the most content of demons, but it’s not like she could even really know the difference. She’s not built that way. So the next time someone comes for her help and it would do something against the Charmed Ones, she doesn’t hesitate. Someone with brains could do a lot against them if they were willing to be cautious about it. But Kyra’s never wanted the Underworld and she values her skin too much to do anything by herself. And she doesn’t have anyone else anyway.

This time it grates because she had been completely evil.

And then she wants to scream or rip her brain out because she’s not supposed to teeter back and forth like this. It’s not right. But that voice inside her is getting louder and louder, complaining about the dankness and dirtiness of the Underworld, the lack of anything interesting, the void of purpose in her life. And it just isn’t natural.

She has so many visions though and a lot of them are about good things, about good people. And she can almost feel their emotions, see life through their eyes. It’s a vicarious pain and pleasure she comes to crave and seeks to avoid. It’s a perilous position, she thinks, one that almost would place her as sympathetic to humanity.

And then she has the vision. The one that changes everything. It’s more powerful than anything she can ever remember seeing. It’s a world of avatars and humanity, light and peace and nothing that resembles her own life. She sees herself as a human, laughing with other humans, running through the grass, able to feel fully at last.

It scares her, but she starts to make her plans as quietly as she can. She knows this is somehow the end. Kyra sends her message to the Elders and then smiles because she sees her Elder coming for her. Except there are demons now…demons who are aware of her plan. And they come for her. She’ll always see them coming, but she knows it won’t ever be enough. Even she can’t run forever. Her hope has to be in the Elders, in her vision.

And so she waits for her Elder and lets him whisk her away to the famed Halliwell attic and she’s deep in the lair of the Charmed Ones.

“Ooh, I have got a lump that won't quit from one of those little snits. Are you sure you can't heal a demon?”

“Don't push it. I saved your life,” Leo tells her, all back to his high and mighty horse.

“Only because the stuffed shirts made you.”

“You know, I still don't understand why you didn't just shimmer out?”

“And miss you coming to meet me? That would've been rude. Plus, I'm eager to make a deal with your bosses. So, why did the Elders send you, anyway? They know we had a thing?”

She winks at him flirtatiously and smiles at the panicked look on his face.

“We didn't have a thing.”

“Mmm. Trying to put that ugly past behind you. I get it.”

“Look, don't waste your seeing powers on me, okay?”

There was something about him. Something was different now. All she was reading off him she was getting from intuition, not premonition.

“Don't have to be a Seer to know that.”

She tries to change the subject and…was that the Book of Shadows? She’d kill for a look in there.

“How about you tell me why your fellow demons are trying to kill you?”

“The Elders didn't tell you? You know, you're hard to read. But that's okay. I like a challenge.”

“Just answer the question.”

“I'm selling them out for bigger and better things, and they're miffed. Not that they wouldn't do the same to me in a New York minute.”

“All right. Well, I gotta fill Piper in. The sisters find you up here, they're gonna kill you.”

“No, no. Actually, they won't. I've seen my death. No babes involved.”

Her grin vanishes as he leaves the room. Her death worries her. It is babe-less, but it’s also vague. She doesn’t like vague visions. They leave her much less wiggle-room to manipulate the situation. And this is her life or death she’s seeing, not just any old vision.

She has to be careful, but maybe she can get just one glimpse into the book… Stupid book charmed against all evil. Still, there’s plenty of other interesting things in the fabled attic. She can pass the time quite nicely.

Except she gets bored really easily. The attic is great and she comes up with at least fifteen ways to kill the Charmed Ones while she’s in there, but she’d much rather be getting on with the deal-making.

So she wanders into the hall and does a bit of harmless thievery before she runs into the two youngest Charmed Ones who typically overreact and attempt to throw things at her, even while she’s being nice.

“Leo, a little help, please!”

He does, at the expense of a family portrait and with much ire of his wife and sisters-in-law. She smiles, cause it’s almost cute.

They argue about demons and men coming over to dinner and the various mental states of each other, but Kyra’s mostly just struck by how uptight the supposed paragons of virtue are. Even demons have less stress.

“That surly one is your wife?”

“Surly? Do you know her?”

Kyra smiles broadly at Piper’s obvious jealousy.

“Who cares? Just blow her up,” says Sister Number One.

“You can't,” Leo tries again.

“Watch me.”

“Fine. Kill me. Who cares if I have enough to kill all upper-level demons?” Kyra offers her bait.

“I really think you should hear her out,” Leo says helpfully.

So lovely this Elder.

“Especially after hunky guy here went to all that trouble to rescue me from those demons.”

Especially when he’s glaring daggers at her for her word choices.

“So, wait. Are you telling me the Elders are getting us to save demons from other demons?”

That would be Sister Number Two.

They all look alike though Kyra knows their destinies like she knows the back of her hand.

The doorbell rings and Kyra can’t resist throwing out some enigmatic advice. She always speaks the truth about her visions. It’s not as much fun otherwise. But she controls how much she tells about them. Plus, she gets to get Elder’s wife all worried about her precious cooking skills.

She settles down in the attic, lounging for all she’s worth, and puts down all her demands for Leo to present to the Elders.

It’s all sugarcoating, inconsequential stuff. She only wants one thing. One thing that she can’t get out of her head no matter how hard she’s been trying. The desire for humanity, the desire to be more than what she is, the feeling that she’s missing something.

Leo and wife are fighting about their kids and quality time and all the stupid human stuff that makes her roll her eyes, but there’s something different about the two of them.

Kyra can’t quite put her finger on it, she’s still trying to figure out what’s so off about Leo anyway, but the two of them seem to be different than other couples. There’s quite a long destiny about them, that she knows, but there’s something so simple, so human about them. It’s tied far beyond their magical abilities or destinies; it’s just their together-ness. It’s beautiful, or would be, were she human. Something she wants to try once she is. Something she thinks might be good.

And when they talk about their kids, it’s sickeningly pathetic, but Kyra’s hit with a sense of memory, like she knows what they’re talking about. Like she’s somehow worried about a kid with a rash before and wanted to be able to spend more time with him. She doesn’t see how that’s possible, but she puts a pin in the idea to think about later.

Right now their little human drama needs to take second place to her imminent threat demon drama.

“On that note, let's move this along, shall we?”

“See?” moans Piper. “It's just endless. I'm never gonna be able to spend any real time with my kids while we're single-handedly trying to rid the world of demons.”

“Hello? I'm a demon you can get rid of. Preferably before I'm ambushed again.”

“Okay, here's her list. Go see what the Elders have to say.”

“Hold on there, sugar,” Kyra adds before Leo can orb out. “I've got one more thing I'd like to add to that list, and it's something only the Elders can give. And it's a deal-breaker. I wanna be made human.”

Their faces are definitely something to remember.

“What? Why in the hell would a powerful demon want to be made human?”

“Hell being the operative word, as in, I live there and it sucks.”

“You know what? I don't think you know anything. I think it's all just one big scam. How do we have any proof?”

Piper’s right to be skeptic but Kyra would be feeling hurt if she could because she’s got the mother lode of proof and sincerity and authentic visions backing her up.

Which is all moot once the Swarm King and some minions pop in and try to kill her. The security in the attic was dreadful and Kyra leaps over the couch to avoid dying and all. Leo vanquishes the demons and the other sisters walk in.

“Is that proof enough for ya, sweetie?” Kyra snaps, examining her wounded arm.

And her vision…

The initial vision, the one that’s her ace up the sleeve is unchanged, but her own future is looking less and less certain and there’s still some unknown voice inside her head crying out for humanity.

So they just argue over her again and what they’re going to do and she knows Destiny protects them a lot more than they think because, honestly, it seems to take them forever to do anything.

But she has to give them something to get this started because it’s starting to spiral out of her control and she hates herself, (not really), for pushing their buttons, but needs must as she drives.

“Okay, okay, fine. I'll give you something. A little enticement. Okay, sure, I have a little black book of demons. But I also have the skinny on a little thing called the Avatars.”

Sister Paige’s man Brody has issues with issues, Kyra thinks, as he obsesses about her words even when she makes obvious references to very fun things that he and Paige had just been doing.

“Can we get back to the Avatars, please?”

“I know that they're close, closer than you think. Could be here any minute.”

And that’s the catalyst that will spur them all into motion. She’s spun her dice, now she hopes they’ll fall where she wills.

They confab about her, not really paying attention to things like proper hearing distances, and Kyra goes back to perusing attic things until Sister Phoebe comes in to play babysitter/spy.

Phoebe’s the sister Kyra’s got the most in common with, after all. Even without active powers, Phoebe has her premonitions and understands what it’s like to see things and to know them beyond a shadow of a doubt.

Kyra’s looking at family albums and she gets odd flashes of herself in pictures like this, with people and a man and a baby. They can’t be true, but she wants them to be.

“Look at this. You're like a family, and there's, like, pictures of fun times and stuff.”

“Look at Wyatt. That's his first birthday,” Phoebe replies, going for the hand to hand contact.

“Yeah.”

“Are those my earrings?” Phoebe asks.

“Yeah. Sorry. They called out to me.” Kyra’s not really that sorry, she’s a demon, but she can practice the niceties. Besides, she’s more interested in the family pictures anyway. “You're so close, and-and you like each other, and you're happy and...”

“Happy and...?” Phoebe asks, putting her hand on Kyra’s shoulder.

Kyra smiles to herself.

“And could you push a little harder on that right shoulder? If you're not gonna get a premonition, you could at least work out that knot.”

“Can't blame a girl for trying, you know?”

“Hey, when I first started getting my visions, I had to touch people too.” She’s pretty sure anyway, though she also remembers pain. Lots and lots of pain. Blinding pain. “Phone.”

Phoebe’s phone rings and Kyra turns back to the pictures while Phoebe answers it. She’s not really interested in those other earthly problems unless it will help her.

Phoebe hangs up and tries again.

“I mean, not that I'm okay with you stealing my stuff, but those earrings really do look amazing on you. Then again, what wouldn't?”

Kyra means to draw a line in the sand here because there’s only so much she can do in this situation.

“You know, sugar, much as I enjoy the flattery and the bonding and even the touching, you're not getting anything out of me until you make me human.”

Phoebe slumps and nods.

“Okay, I get it. But what I don't get is why you want to be human. I mean, did the bad stuff just start to get to you after a while?

Kyra shakes her head. It’s more complicated than even she knows, but she can try to put some of it into words. That inner voice of hers she’s not telling anyone about, no matter how magically affiliated or good at backrubs they are.

“No. The good stuff did. In my line of work, I see a lot of good and bad, and the good's just better. Problem is, I can see it, but I can't feel it.”

“That's the thing about vision. It's a blessing and a curse.”

“Yep. You know, being a demon is about feeding the endless emptiness, and I'm sick of it. I long for the subtle notes in between.”

Kyra doesn’t even realize how much she means that until right this moment. She wants to feel something, to remember what she once knew.

“And the Avatars have something to do with that, right? I'm just not sure what.” Kyra just smiles at her. “Right. Bargaining chip.”

“Look, it's not like I'm being tight-lipped and mean for no reason. I can't give you what you want, or I won't get what I want.” But Phoebe doesn’t look convinced. “I see. You're not even sure I have anything you want.”

“Look, I want to trust you, I really do. But you're a demon.”

Kyra has a fabulous idea. One guaranteed to get her out of the attic for one thing.

“How about I help you with your other problem instead? You know, the thing with the cop. Uh, Sheridan. If I find her for you, then would you trust me?”

Pheobe hands her the pen and Kyra smiles. The whole thing is a snap. Going on an adventure with a Charmed One won’t be so bad.

It doesn’t take long, she is that good, after all, and then she waits while Phoebe makes a phone call and gets ready to go before she shimmers them to the location.

She is a bit taken back by the level of trust Phoebe is showing here, letting herself get shimmered by a demon with questionable motives.

Kyra’s just glad to be outside. It’s beautiful. Beautiful in a way she can’t even understand. It’s been quite a long time since she was above ground and, for some reason, that little voice is telling her she should be remembering a feeling.

Phoebe’s cop is a delicious bit of scorn, obviously not wanting anything to do with magic or demons. But the poor thing has been squabbling with his wife all week long and Kyra doesn’t mind giving him some free advice.

Then she lets them argue because she finds herself inextricably drawn toward that green grass. She doesn’t know why, but she starts to spin and she knows she’s feeling this. Not like a human, but, somehow, actually feeling the beauty of the moment. And it’s not enough. She needs more.

“Uh-oh. Okay,” Phoebe says rushing over to her, “there's plenty of time for this when you're human.”

“Oh, come on, take off your shoes and let me feel the grass through you.”

Phoebe is sadly reticent to the idea and they go into the building which is decidedly less fun than the grass. Kyra gets so many pictures of despair and pain and confusion that she wants to run away. She’s not exactly a cowardly person; she’s gone up against demons and…vampires before. But this place is horrible.

“What kind of place is this?”

“It's a mental hospital.”

“Oh, whoa. I've never seen this side of good in my visions before. It's so…bad.”

“Yeah, well, there's a downside to being able to feel things sometimes,” Phoebe says sadly.

“Well, I'd still take good that's not always good over bad that's never good.”

Kyra says it with a weird confidence that she didn’t know she possessed. She means it so very much. She wants to be human and good more than anything she’s ever wanted. Somehow she knows that she’s like that. She’ll take the inconvenience to herself if it ultimately means something better.

“Somehow, I know exactly what you mean.”

They find Phoebe’s cop and it apparently is a lot more horrible than Kyra knows because Phoebe gets very terrified for Paige and they rush back to the house where Elder Leo is flipping out over Kyra’s absence from the attic. Phoebe sharply brings him back to the point of Paige.

“You know, you could've waited for me, and I could've taken her.”

“I came back, didn't I?” Kyra says, realizing with a start what is different about Leo now.

She smiles to herself because it’s all so delicious. What a secret. And she’s only ashamed she didn’t read it before now.

“Because you need us.”

“And because she likes us,” Phoebe adds which gives Kyra a surprisingly interesting reaction to the idea.

It might be called warm.

“Okay, are you two buddy-buddies starting to read each other?”

“What are you afraid of anyway? That I'm gonna tell her your dirty little secret?”

“What makes you think I have any secrets?” Leo asks, looking very guilty.

Phoebe has to go and bring them back round to Paige and Leo orbs out to get his wife.

Phoebe is obviously confused now about events and Kyra wishes she could clear them up for her. She likes Phoebe. A lot. But her vision tells her that this situation is way too delicate to tip her hand too soon. Her own life depends on it.

But she’s totally happy to id some demons for the witch. And there’s not a single one in the book that she would be sorry to see burned up in an Avatar Ruled World.

“Okay, so what I'm gathering is pretty much every demon in this book hates you?”

“Pretty much,” Kyra says. “Which is sad because they're my family. Well, I mean, it would be sad if I had feelings.”

She somehow has the feeling family is very important to her. Or used to be. Or…if only the voice in her head would be just a little bit more clear on what exactly Kyra is supposed to be remembering. That would be a big help, she thinks.

“Well, don't worry, I'm gonna put something in the spell about that.”

Kyra looks down at Phoebe.

“Thanks. You really care about what happens to me, don't you?”

“Yeah, I do, I guess.”

“That's nice. I like that.”

She does. Kyra likes the idea of having a…friend, someone to rely on.

They’re interrupted by Leo and Piper’s return without Paige and Kyra doesn’t even bother to look surprised that Paige decided to stay with Mad Man Brody.

But then they’re back on her.

“We need to get the information about the Avatars so I can use it as leverage against the Elders,” Leo says.

“You know my terms,” Kyra replies.

“Your terms are ridiculous,” Piper throws in.

“Look, what if I personally guarantee you get what you want?”

“Oh, I'm supposed to trust you now?” Kyra asks Leo incredulously.

Kyra tries to remain rational about the whole thing. But her death appears to be moving closer and closer and, while it’s better than living like a demon, she’d much rather be human. There’s still a piece of the puzzle missing but right now what she’s sensing is that the longing she’s feeling is actually more like memories. Which she doesn’t understand, but that would explain the flashes of connection she keeps having.

Phoebe takes a deep breath and looks Kyra in the eyes.

“Okay, remember how you said that you can sense that I care about you?”

“Mm-hm.”

“Well, I can sense that you care about me too. So, please, give me the information that we need.”

It’s a huge gamble. It’s so un-demon-like. But maybe this is where she’s been going all along. Maybe trust is a big part of being human.

“I can't tell you. But I can show you.”

She places her hands on Phoebe’s and transmits her vision. She sees everything that Phoebe sees as well as what Leo and Piper are doing while they watch. She’s just that good. It’s a little bit like having her vision for the first time and she revels again in its beauty. It’s even more potent now that someone actually human is experiencing it too.

Then the vision changes into something horrible. Her death was very vague before but now it’s crystal clear. She’s terrified, alone, in the dark, and Zankou is there. He kills her brutally and she’s broken into a million, dark, little pieces, absolutely unfulfilled.

Zankou. That’s very not good. Of anyone they could get to kill her, that’s not who she wants.

She tries to control her panic.

“Now you know why I'm doing this.”

“Yeah, with no demons in the future, you'd be extinct.”

It’s not the whole reason. No, she’s got a whole personal crisis going on, but it’s the only reason they’ll be able to comprehend.

“If I even get to that future, which, if Zankou has his way, I won't,” Kyra says.

Leo rambles on about choices and Phoebe’s worried about Paige and Piper still isn’t getting it. Which, Kyra can understand, seeing as how she hasn’t seen the vision and she isn’t Leo.

“Okay, hang on a second. We don't know any of this for sure and, even you made the Avatar future seem threatening.”

“Well, duh,” Kyra tells her. “If I made it sound peachy, you wouldn't have helped me. The fact is, I didn't see anything threatening.” And because she’s feeling particularly cornered and panicky after the vision… “How about you, Leo?”

“Okay, seriously, what is it with you two?”

“Are you gonna tell her, or shall I? I told you I liked a challenge. So, what's it gonna be?”

It may not seem like it but this is actually a…good thing she’s doing. He needs to come clean with his wife.

He doesn’t even look grateful.

“Look, apparently, what she has seen, is that I know the Avatars are good, because I'm an Avatar.”

“What? That's insane. What does that mean?”

Piper goes crazy and Leo attempts to reason with her and Kyra gives them a few moments of marriage time because she senses it’s a bit important but her imminent death is really more important to her.

“Okay, guys, guys, can we just put this on hold for a second?”

“She's right,” Phoebe says. “This can wait, she can't. I've seen her vanquish, and we have to make her human right now. She held up her end of the deal. Now it's the Elders' turn.”

“Okay, well, I can't exactly go to the Elders and say, ‘The Seer saw Utopia.’ They're not gonna believe me.”

“No, but they'll believe me,” Phoebe says and then turns to Kyra. “Piper's gonna help you get your stuff together for your new life. And if I were you, I'd go upstairs and get the dress that matches those earrings, because you're gonna look amazing in it. We'll be right back with the spell.”

That’s it; Kyra’s definitely feeling something right now. She’s…happy. She’s…excited. She feels almost fulfilled. She’s still missing something, but she senses this is the first right step to get where she’s supposed to be. She has something to do, something important.

And Piper’s being a lot nicer now that she knows what Kyra knows about her own husband. It’s almost what Kyra would imagine having a sister is like. A little bit nag-y, but always with your best interest at heart.

“You know, I don't think Phoebe would mind throwing in some shoes.”

“Oh, thanks, but I won't need them. Soon as I'm human, I'm hoping your guy will orb me to Golden Gate Park and I can finally run through that grass.”

She can almost see herself doing it too.

“Have you thought of a name for yourself?”

“Oh, it's Kyra. It always has been. It's just everyone calls me, uh, the Seer.” She turns and smiles at Piper. “Okay, honestly, now, how do I look? I've never worn anything so... fun.”

“Kyra, you look great,” Piper says sincerely.

“Thanks.”

Kyra blames herself because she’s not paying attention when Phoebe comes back into the room and sends Piper to get Leo with the spell.

“Hey, you look really great,” Phoebe says.

“Sure you don't mind me borrowing it?” Kyra asks her new friend.

“No, not at all. Although I'm much more of a black kind of guy myself. I think it's a lot more appropriate for a funeral. Don't you, Kyra?”

The warning bells go off but not quickly enough. And this is the moment and all her visions come crashing down around her head, changing too quickly for her to see clearly.

“Wait, how did you...”

She can’t breathe, Zankou is suddenly there, crushing her windpipe.

“Hello, sugar.”

She knows. She knows now. It’s all so crystal clear. And even if she can remember Zankou, remember the time they spend in the Underworld together, it doesn’t matter because it didn’t happen. What matters is that her second chance is ending. Her purpose is crumbling. Everything that happened before is being erased.

“Did I call you that ever? What I meant to say was, ‘Hello, swirling particles of scum,’ ” she chokes out.

“You always were amusing. But, still, I can't allow you to betray us all just to save your own ass.”

He throws her to the ground and sends his power against her. It swarms and swallows her whole. Dimly she hears him talking and Piper crying out and Phoebe’s voice. She faintly regrets not getting to say goodbye to Phoebe.

But she’s in so much pain as all of her gets ripped apart, the bits of his power tearing off chunks of her very being. She screams and screams even though there’s no sound and she’s not even her anymore. No, but she knows who she is. She’s Cordelia Chase. And now she’s lost her second chance.