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jesterladyficSo, again, this is something probably only I would want to read, but I just had to write it after a recent watch, because seriously? You're gonna let it end like that, writers?
Title: Heart-Affecting Apprehension
Pairing: Shawn/Angela
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Moments of the year of Shawn's life that Angela was in Europe. What happened in the brave new world.
Disclaimer: I don't own Boy Meets World.
Heart-Affecting Apprehension
She called him when they got to the base in Brussels.
“I miss you already,” she said. He laughed and said she couldn’t miss him more than he missed her. They didn’t say anything personal after that. She told him about the plane ride and what the base was like. He told her about Topanga’s internship and how Cory was reacting. They talked for a few hours and then she told him she loved him and hung up. He sank to his bed and stayed there for the rest of the night.
***
Two days after she’d been there, he called her and told her about Cory and Topanga’s decision to move to New York. She sounded sad and yet happy to hear it.
“What are you going to do?” she asked. His heart sank as he realized he’d been hoping she’d say she’d come back now, or ask him to come there, or something. Anything but this emptiness inside of him.
“I don’t know,” he said. He was determined to not make her feel bad for leaving.
“I’m always here for you,” she said. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
***
She’d been gone for two weeks and she called him once he was settled in New York. He and Eric had found an apartment two floors down from the one shared by Cory and Topanga.
“What’s it like living with just Eric?” she asked and he could hear other people in the background.
“Noisy,” he answered.
She said she’d been meeting so many people and seeing everything she could see. He wondered if she even missed him now.
“I love you,” she said and hung up the phone.
***
Angela had been gone for a month and he called her to let her know he’d gotten a job with a small magazine.
“Your writing is beautiful,” she said. “You have to send me everything.”
“I will,” he promised. “You’re my biggest fan.”
“I always will be. Listen, Shawn, I gotta go.” He said goodbye and hung up the phone. What used to last for hours now lasted minutes.
***
She’d been gone for three months and he hadn’t heard anything from her in several weeks, apart from one postcard and an email. He left her a message and tried not to rip Eric’s head off. It wasn’t the other man’s fault. Eric’s prank calls to Mr. Feeny at three in the morning weren’t what was keeping Shawn awake.
***
Angela called him two weeks later and apologized for being so busy. She said her dad had been given a month’s furlough and they’d been traveling all around Europe.
“I wish you could see it,” she said. “Someday, I’ll take you here and show you everything.”
“That will be nice,” he said, but he didn’t believe her anymore.
“I love being with my dad,” she said. “I needed this.”
“I’m glad you’re happy,” he answered. “That’s what I want.”
She changed the subject.
***
She’d been gone for five months and he didn’t think he could last another one, let alone seven. It didn’t matter if she still said she loved him with warmth, she’d left him, and he couldn’t believe she would come back. Cory urged him with several fiery speeches not to give up, but Cory’s speeches were tinged with Shawn’s unbelief when he listened to them. Maybe he would go out with Kristen. She’d been hanging around him at work lately. Eric urged him to go for the hottie that was in the same country. But then Angela wrote him a long letter, including pictures, and he was torn apart again.
***
She hadn’t contacted him in a month and Shawn finally let his heart shatter. It had been empty for months, but now, at the half way mark, he felt broken inside. His abandonment issues were never far away and she’d known that. She’d left him anyway and he’d let her go because sometimes he didn’t believe he was worth someone staying for. He went to Cory and he didn’t even have to say anything. Cory knew.
***
Angela wasn’t coming back, he decided. An email was all at the seventh month. He was going to go for Kristen; he couldn’t take being alone anymore, not with Cory and Topanga’s obvious joy and love there at every turn.
He got up and headed for the phone. He would call her and end it, even if it was with her voicemail. Then he’d call Kristen. There was a knock at the door, but he ignored it. Eric answered it and Shawn dropped the phone. Angela was standing there. She was beautiful. Her hair was different, longer in front and shorter in the back.
Eric grinned and gave her a hug and pinched her cheek and ran upstairs. Shawn knew he probably had exactly four minutes before Cory and Topanga came running down the stairs, slightly longer if Mrs. Hanuk was cooking in the hallway again and they had to come the long way round.
“I like your hair,” was all he could say.
“Thank you,” she said. “Can I come in?”
He moved away silently.
“What are you doing here?” he finally asked, mentally counting down the seconds.
“I can’t do it anymore,” she said, moving to take his hand. He looked down and he’d forgotten how good her hand felt.
“Europe?”
“Being away from you,” she answered. “I love my dad and I’m so glad I spent this time with him, but I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
“I didn’t think you were coming back,” he said quietly. It hurt to say it out loud. He’d been pretending for so long. She looked away for a minute.
“I’m sorry, Shawn. I swore I’d never leave you and now…now I hurt you, just like my mom hurt my dad.” Tears started to fill her eyes and in that moment, he could forgive her anything.
“No, no,” he said, wrapping his arms around her. Oh, she felt so good. “You came back. Don’t ever leave again.” Gone was his pride. She’d come to him.
“I’m not gonna leave again,” she said. “I hated being away from you. I want to go back with you someday, but for now, it’s time to start living my life.”
He clasped her hands and looked into her eyes, eyes he thought he’d never see again.
“You choose me?”
“Always,” she said. “Is that what you want? I don’t have any right to ask.”
“I give you the right,” he said firmly. Maybe he was crazy. Maybe he just couldn’t stand being alone. Maybe too many people leaving him had caused him to crack. But she was here now and she was what he wanted. What he needed.
“Thank you,” she said softly. “We’re both pretty stupid and stubborn.”
“Freshman year, what a waste,” he said. She smiled.
“I’ll try not to let you down. Now kiss me before Cory bursts through that door.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, a smile finally growing over his features. Her skin was so much softer than he remembered. Oh, how he’d dreamt of this.
“I love you so much,” he whispered and kissed her again. Then he needed more and she needed more and he managed to lock the door before she hastily backed him up against the couch. Then his shirt was gone and her hair was in his eyes and need drove him more than ever before. He pulled away to look at her and he could actually see the love in her eyes. Love for him. It amazed him.
“Come here,” he said. He took her hand and led her to his room, never once looking away from her eyes. He never wanted to look away again.
Pounding sounded at the door, but they didn’t hear anything. They were together again and that was what was important. Cory and Topanga had their happy love, now it was Shawn and Angela’s turn and they weren’t going to waste another minute.
Title: Heart-Affecting Apprehension
Pairing: Shawn/Angela
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Moments of the year of Shawn's life that Angela was in Europe. What happened in the brave new world.
Disclaimer: I don't own Boy Meets World.
Heart-Affecting Apprehension
She called him when they got to the base in Brussels.
“I miss you already,” she said. He laughed and said she couldn’t miss him more than he missed her. They didn’t say anything personal after that. She told him about the plane ride and what the base was like. He told her about Topanga’s internship and how Cory was reacting. They talked for a few hours and then she told him she loved him and hung up. He sank to his bed and stayed there for the rest of the night.
***
Two days after she’d been there, he called her and told her about Cory and Topanga’s decision to move to New York. She sounded sad and yet happy to hear it.
“What are you going to do?” she asked. His heart sank as he realized he’d been hoping she’d say she’d come back now, or ask him to come there, or something. Anything but this emptiness inside of him.
“I don’t know,” he said. He was determined to not make her feel bad for leaving.
“I’m always here for you,” she said. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
***
She’d been gone for two weeks and she called him once he was settled in New York. He and Eric had found an apartment two floors down from the one shared by Cory and Topanga.
“What’s it like living with just Eric?” she asked and he could hear other people in the background.
“Noisy,” he answered.
She said she’d been meeting so many people and seeing everything she could see. He wondered if she even missed him now.
“I love you,” she said and hung up the phone.
***
Angela had been gone for a month and he called her to let her know he’d gotten a job with a small magazine.
“Your writing is beautiful,” she said. “You have to send me everything.”
“I will,” he promised. “You’re my biggest fan.”
“I always will be. Listen, Shawn, I gotta go.” He said goodbye and hung up the phone. What used to last for hours now lasted minutes.
***
She’d been gone for three months and he hadn’t heard anything from her in several weeks, apart from one postcard and an email. He left her a message and tried not to rip Eric’s head off. It wasn’t the other man’s fault. Eric’s prank calls to Mr. Feeny at three in the morning weren’t what was keeping Shawn awake.
***
Angela called him two weeks later and apologized for being so busy. She said her dad had been given a month’s furlough and they’d been traveling all around Europe.
“I wish you could see it,” she said. “Someday, I’ll take you here and show you everything.”
“That will be nice,” he said, but he didn’t believe her anymore.
“I love being with my dad,” she said. “I needed this.”
“I’m glad you’re happy,” he answered. “That’s what I want.”
She changed the subject.
***
She’d been gone for five months and he didn’t think he could last another one, let alone seven. It didn’t matter if she still said she loved him with warmth, she’d left him, and he couldn’t believe she would come back. Cory urged him with several fiery speeches not to give up, but Cory’s speeches were tinged with Shawn’s unbelief when he listened to them. Maybe he would go out with Kristen. She’d been hanging around him at work lately. Eric urged him to go for the hottie that was in the same country. But then Angela wrote him a long letter, including pictures, and he was torn apart again.
***
She hadn’t contacted him in a month and Shawn finally let his heart shatter. It had been empty for months, but now, at the half way mark, he felt broken inside. His abandonment issues were never far away and she’d known that. She’d left him anyway and he’d let her go because sometimes he didn’t believe he was worth someone staying for. He went to Cory and he didn’t even have to say anything. Cory knew.
***
Angela wasn’t coming back, he decided. An email was all at the seventh month. He was going to go for Kristen; he couldn’t take being alone anymore, not with Cory and Topanga’s obvious joy and love there at every turn.
He got up and headed for the phone. He would call her and end it, even if it was with her voicemail. Then he’d call Kristen. There was a knock at the door, but he ignored it. Eric answered it and Shawn dropped the phone. Angela was standing there. She was beautiful. Her hair was different, longer in front and shorter in the back.
Eric grinned and gave her a hug and pinched her cheek and ran upstairs. Shawn knew he probably had exactly four minutes before Cory and Topanga came running down the stairs, slightly longer if Mrs. Hanuk was cooking in the hallway again and they had to come the long way round.
“I like your hair,” was all he could say.
“Thank you,” she said. “Can I come in?”
He moved away silently.
“What are you doing here?” he finally asked, mentally counting down the seconds.
“I can’t do it anymore,” she said, moving to take his hand. He looked down and he’d forgotten how good her hand felt.
“Europe?”
“Being away from you,” she answered. “I love my dad and I’m so glad I spent this time with him, but I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
“I didn’t think you were coming back,” he said quietly. It hurt to say it out loud. He’d been pretending for so long. She looked away for a minute.
“I’m sorry, Shawn. I swore I’d never leave you and now…now I hurt you, just like my mom hurt my dad.” Tears started to fill her eyes and in that moment, he could forgive her anything.
“No, no,” he said, wrapping his arms around her. Oh, she felt so good. “You came back. Don’t ever leave again.” Gone was his pride. She’d come to him.
“I’m not gonna leave again,” she said. “I hated being away from you. I want to go back with you someday, but for now, it’s time to start living my life.”
He clasped her hands and looked into her eyes, eyes he thought he’d never see again.
“You choose me?”
“Always,” she said. “Is that what you want? I don’t have any right to ask.”
“I give you the right,” he said firmly. Maybe he was crazy. Maybe he just couldn’t stand being alone. Maybe too many people leaving him had caused him to crack. But she was here now and she was what he wanted. What he needed.
“Thank you,” she said softly. “We’re both pretty stupid and stubborn.”
“Freshman year, what a waste,” he said. She smiled.
“I’ll try not to let you down. Now kiss me before Cory bursts through that door.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, a smile finally growing over his features. Her skin was so much softer than he remembered. Oh, how he’d dreamt of this.
“I love you so much,” he whispered and kissed her again. Then he needed more and she needed more and he managed to lock the door before she hastily backed him up against the couch. Then his shirt was gone and her hair was in his eyes and need drove him more than ever before. He pulled away to look at her and he could actually see the love in her eyes. Love for him. It amazed him.
“Come here,” he said. He took her hand and led her to his room, never once looking away from her eyes. He never wanted to look away again.
Pounding sounded at the door, but they didn’t hear anything. They were together again and that was what was important. Cory and Topanga had their happy love, now it was Shawn and Angela’s turn and they weren’t going to waste another minute.
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Date: 2010-02-11 08:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-11 08:17 pm (UTC)