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jesterladyfic“For someone who’s so evil, you really are a coward, you know?” Buffy said, exasperated as she practically pulled Spike along.
“You take that back, silly chit!” Spike snapped at her. “You should be a bit on the edgy side yourself, bringing your vampire mate home to meet the parents.”
“Already did that, honey,” she reminded him.
“Yeah, look how well that turned out. Second try’s gonna go so much better.”
“I won’t pretend I’m not worried. But we have to. And if you would just really tone down your obvious Spike-ness, it would really help me out, ok?
“Not gonna lie about what I am, love.”
“I don’t want you to. But don’t go out of your way to prove it, and please don’t let Xander bait you. He’ll try.”
“Please. Your boy doesn’t know a thing about baiting. Bloody amateur.” But Spike grasped her hand in agreement as they approached Giles’.
***
To Spike it felt like being back in the Initiative as they walked through the door. Everybody staring at him, making observations and judgments and all he could do was stare back. But one thing warmed his dead heart and that was Tara, who got up from her seat on the couch and hugged him calmly.
“Spike, I-I was worried about you. Are you all right?”
“Sure thing, pet. Never better.” He winked at her.
“I guess I don’t have to wonder where you two have been for the last day,” she
said softly, but mischievously, into his ear. He widened his eyes and smiled innocently,
but Tara knew she had relieved some of the tension built up in him. Tara stepped back and Spike and Buffy were left with the rest of the not so welcoming room.
“Hi, guys,” Buffy said. “Look who I found.”
“Hi, Spike. Enjoying the recoupling process?” Anya asked from her comfy spot on
the couch.
“Anya!” Xander hissed at her.
“What, Xander? Did I say something inappropriate? I believe it is customary to
greet people when they walk in the room. Even disgusting demons do that.”
“We’re not happy about the evil bloodsucker being back in our midst, Anya.”
“I have to disagree with you on that. I am happy to see him. I’ll wager Tara is happy to see him and by the post-coital bliss surrounding the two of them, I think Buffy is happy too.” Xander winced and ignored her.
“Buff, you think we could talk to you privately, me and Giles?”
“Yes, I think that would be best,” Giles agreed.
“No.” The two men stared at her.
“Buffy, I think it would be better for all concerned if we have a chance to
discuss what to do privately.”
“Giles, there’s no need to discuss what to do. I know what to do, the question is, do you? Besides, any conversation to be had about Spike and me will involve both me and Spike.”
“So, you’re keeping him? Despite everything we all know him to be?” Xander could
barely keep his voice down.
“Xander, remember, I-statements,” Willow tried to soothe him. But that only seemed to upset both Buffy and Xander even further.
“Not to be rude, Will, but last time we tried the I-statements, it didn’t work out
so well. Buffy still chose the undead over us.”
“No, I didn’t,” Buffy said angrily. “I chose you. Angel and I never had a chance. Looking back, not so sad over that, but it should’ve been different. Your guy’s little interventions never work out well. And that is not my doing. All of you just can’t handle my having a life, my doing anything without your approval, my ability to make decisions you don’t agree with.”
“Buffy, please. We don’t want to judge you, we just want you to see what you’re doing.” Willow looked desperately at Oz for help. He took her hand and looked at her.
“Will, know that I’ll always back you up. But I gotta come down on the other side for this one. I know about power, uncontrolled power. It’s not fun, but if Spike is willing to make the effort. We gotta give him the chance.”
“Oz,” she whispered. “What if-“
“What if what, Red?” Everybody looked in surprise at the object of their
disapproval.
Spike moved to the stairs and sat down, and if he had any cigarettes on him, he would’ve lit one. Buffy remained standing in the center of the room with her arms folded across her chest. Spike started to casually inspect his fingernails. “What if I decide to go all crazy on you? Been there, done that. What if I decide I like to kill people better than helping them. Also a past action of mine. What if I decide I like to drink human blood and you’re the closest thing to me? Well, if that doesn’t describe these past few months where I helped in every bloody way I could, I don’t know what does. I won’t lie to you all; I’m a demon. Deal with it. Because both of us have had to.”
“I don’t think I want you in my house anymore, Spike,” Giles said firmly. Spike grinned wickedly and got up.
“Sure thing, Dad. Gotta follow the rules now that I made my choice.” And he started to move toward the door. Buffy caught his arm.
“If he goes, Giles, I go. I’m not doing this anymore, this having to choose between my best friends and the man I love. If you want to talk to me, let’s talk. I want to explain, but if you don’t want him here, you don’t want me here.” Giles stared at her in unbelief for a minute, then slowly nodded his head.
“All right, Buffy. We’ll all stay. We’ll all stay and chat about our feelings and why you’re betraying your calling.” Moving back into the room, Buffy and Spike stood together facing the crowd.
Tara moved till she was behind them and she and Anya sat on the stairs, clearly decisive but not participating. Sensing the heat, Jonathan and Andrew moved to the bathroom to continue their duel. Giles and Xander stood facing the blonde couple. Willow sat on the couch, Oz beside her, but despite their linked hands, a vast distance separated their viewpoints. An outsider would’ve known the situation clearly, they were choosing sides.
Willow started in slowly,
“Buffy, Spike, we have all agreed that you two love each other. And none of us
would even say that it’s one sided. We know what Spike is like in love and I would just like to say, that’s a scary thing. But I don’t think either of you are thinking about if it’s the best thing for you two.”
“Will, believe me. We weighed the options here. We decided what we think is best. We’ll deal with any consequences.”
“Consequences like dead friends in beds. Like a trail of corpses around town cause your dead guy lost restraint one night. Cause-” Xander threw up his hands. “You know what? I don’t even care. You don’t marry vampires, you kill them. No matter how many souls, chips or any other specialty item they may have. Why can’t you see that?”
“Why can’t you see the hypocrisy of your opinion? You’re dating an ex-demon, Willow is dating a werewolf. These are all things we put under the evil-kill em dead category. Yet here they are, Xander, here they are.”
“Ex-demon. Ex, Buffy. And Oz is only a werewolf three nights a month.”
“Gotta disagree there, bro,” put in the object of discussion. “I feel it all month long, I can sense it. I’m not human anymore. I couldn’t deal with that, so I ran away. I dealt with it. I’m back. Spike couldn’t deal with himself, so he ran away. He’s back. Now you gotta deal.” Xander turned away.
“Fine, we are all of a sudden the rehabilitation center for things that go bump in the night. Guess I wish I’d known when I signed up. Cause the pamphlet mentioned something about killing them instead. But my point remains, Oz and Anya don’t want to be evil. That thing beside you does.”
“Wrong again, Xander,” Anya mentioned from the stairs. “There are a great many times I wish I were still a demon. The only difference between me then and me now is now I can’t liquefy your insides with the power of my mind. You should be grateful for that right about now. Oh, and make no mistake, I could be evil, so could you. You’re doing a fine impression of it and depend on not having sex tonight, okay?” Xander lost his ability to form words with his mouth and Giles took over.
“I think we’re all losing sight of the point here. The point is that there is Spike. He and Buffy love each other. Buffy is the Slayer. Spike is a vampire. Spike wants to be evil. Buffy wants to be good. How do these two mesh? The answer is they don’t.”
“Could you all just listen to yourselves?” Buffy cried out. “Spike doesn’t want to be evil. Not in the way you mean. He wants to take his evil tendencies and use them for the power of good, because he loves me. And he loves you all too.” Heads snapped up around the room, including Spike’s.
“Stretching it, Slayer.”
“I mean it. He doesn’t even know it. But I do, and you should too. Think of what he’s done for us. Think of how he could treat you if I were his only object. Spike’s a pain, but that’s just his personality, not his moral identity. I’m not saying it won’t be an adjustment, but he has a lot to offer and he’s giving us all he has. Please give him a chance.” Buffy had tears in her eyes, but her face was hardened in a determined mask. Willow looked around and noted each person’s face.
“I don’t know. I hear the sense of what you’re saying. It’s like hammering in my head, but the ol’ door in my brain doesn’t wanna open right now. It’ll take time. Could we have time, please?”
“Yes, that would be my number one priority as well,” Giles said, finally. “I promise I won’t let my Watcher stigmatism blind me, but I need to think about all this some more.” Buffy nodded in agreement, then looked at Xander. He didn’t quite meet her eyes.
“Thinking is good. You’re probably right, as usual. I know my only special skills are building things, bowling and attracting demon ladies who want to bite my head off. I just can’t seem to push past your Chosen One powers of always being right. We’ll fix it right, we always do. But, Buffy,” he finally looked at her. “We’re not okay. Someday, but not now.”
“I understand,” she said. “Spike and I are going to go home now. Can we all talk tomorrow?” Nods of ascent from around the room. “Fine, see you all then.” They turned and walked out the door.
***
They cut across the cemetery on their way home. Two small, black clad blondes, hiding immense power under their frames. To the casual observer: easy prey. So thought the vampire who had been risen for a bare two weeks.
Buffy sensed his attack before he was within striking range. Twisting under his raised leg, she swept her own out, knocking him to the ground. He kicked his other leg, catching her in the head and knocking her against a tombstone. Spike caught the leg as it came down and flipped the vampire so it was facing downward and yelled to Buffy for a stake. He half-turned to see if she was all right and found her busy flipping to her feet and trading blows with a demon that was small, but extremely agile.
Focusing his attention back toward the vampire, Spike received an elbow in the face as he turned over. Cursing his lack of focus, Spike jammed his foot onto the vampire’s stomach, who lashed out with his feet, sending Spike hurtling. He flipped through the air to land on his feet, but was now closer to the other fighting pair. The demon had Buffy by the throat, but couldn’t see the knife Spike sent hurtling toward her. She grabbed it out of the air and thrust it through the demon. He let go with a gasp and she fell to the ground. Spike ducked as the vampire once more came at him, but was then left in gaping astonishment as the figure flew past him to help the demon up from its knife inflicted agonies. Spike ran to Buffy’s side and they both watched in confusion as the vampire helped the demon up and they prepared to charge the Slayer and Vampire again.
“Ok, weirdness,” said Buffy.
“Your call, Slayer.”
“Let’s see how you do against your own kind,” she offered. For an answer, Spike
grabbed the stake out of her pants pocket and threw it into the oncoming vampire, where it hit with a large thump and then crumbled into dust with the once creature of the night. At the same time, Buffy had leapt over the demon’s head and grabbing it from behind, snapped its neck with a resounding crunch.
“You ok, love?” he asked.
“Well and kicking, you?”
“Right as rain. Interesting that.”
“I’ll say, vamps helping demons. They hate each other.”
“That we do; kinda hard to like someone who thinks you’re an abomination.”
“We should tell Gi-“ Buffy stopped, mid word. “I guess, Giles probably will want to know. But I think we should wait till we’re his favorite people again.”
“Till you’re his favorite people again,” Spike corrected her. “Now, let’s just get home.” They walked a couple more paces, hand in hand, unwilling to not be touching after the weeks apart.
“Spike.” Buffy stopped walking. “I just thought of something. I bet Adam is
bringing all the demons together. Making them work together or something.”
“How you figure, Slayer?”
“Well, those guys are like the most action I’ve seen in weeks. No Slayer
patrolled needed. And then they show up again, all palsy and stuff. I think Mr. I Want to Know More About Life, is having demon integration meetings. That’s why they haven’t
been around lately.”
“Makes sense. Once they earn their ‘We’re all friends’ badge, they can come out and wreak a little violence again.” Seeing her downhearted look, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. “Buffy, we’ll tell the Watcher tomorrow. In the meantime, can we just go home and let me show you how much I appreciate the support back there?”
“Ok,” she agreed, seemingly reluctantly. “If it will make you feel better.
“Much better, I promise,” he said.
